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Anal Sex
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Anal sex is not experienced exclusively by
gay men; it is a facet of our collective sexual identity
which has been explored by previous cultures and continues
to be explored today. Men and women of all walks of life
enjoy anal sex as an alternative to everyday lovemaking. Its
not for everyone, but anal sex may be what you're looking
for if you want to try something completely different.
Why do
people enjoy anal sex?
Anal sex is enjoyable because of the rich
body of nerve endings in the anus. While people often
experience pain when first attempting anal sex, as a person
learns to relax, the pain often subsides into pleasure. For
men, anal sex also offers stimulation to the prostate, an
organ that provides the rush of pleasure during orgasm. Anal
sex for many seems like a taboo activity, and much of
society still shuns it. But statistics show that roughly 35%
of heterosexuals and 50% of the gay community practice anal
sex at least occasionally.
How can I
enjoy anal sex?
Tips for beginners
To prepare yourself for anal sex, the
first thing to do is learn to relax. This may include a hot
bath beforehand, an erotic massage or even just a good
workout. Remember that the sphincter muscles around the anus
will not allow things to pass through easily unless you
relax and take it slow. Do not start with something the size
of a dildo or penis. Start with either: a) your partner's
finger or b) Small
Love Plug. The plug provides a unique sensation and many
couples consider it an exciting addition to the bedroom. If
you're more comfortable with a partner's finger then start
with that. The basic principle is to start small and work
your way up.
One partner should lubricate or place a
lubricated condom over his or her finger. Take the finger
and arouse the surface of the anus, perhaps making small
circular motions as you go. Always pay attention to your
partner to indicate whether or not he or she feels
comfortable. Slowly attempt to push your finger (or plug)
slightly inside the anus. Do not use force - stop
immediately if your partner complains of discomfort. If it
is difficult to enter the anus, you probably need more
lubrication. The first time you try this, the receiver may
feel a bit of pain. Anal sex is not for everyone, and if you
feel uncomfortable stop and perhaps try again later. Think
of this process as training for later anal encounters. Even
a finger can provide intense stimulation when it is inserted
in the anus.
Once you have tried penetration with a
finger a number of times then you can move towards something
that is a bit larger. First you have to decide on what type
of anal stimulation that you enjoy. Do you enjoy the
movement of a finger, the fullness of a plug, or the feeling
of entry and withdrawal? You may wish to proceed by being
penetrated with your partner's penis or by using an anal
toy. For those who enjoy the feeling of penetration more
than motion or vibration, try butt plugs which are designed
specifically for this purpose. A butt plug sits inside the
anus, and is not generally used for thrusting back and
forth. If a plug interests you, we suggest the Big
Flirt. This beautiful toy is made of pure silicone and
features a graduated design. The texture is
unrivaled. It's soft but resilient and retains body
heat. You won't find a better plug. We're confident
you'll love the feel of this toy.
How can I
make anal sex safer?
Anal sex can be a perfectly safe activity
as long as you take the necessary precautions. You should
remember that your anus and rectum do not have their own
natural lubrication nor the kind of elasticity the mouth and
vagina enjoy. That is why anal sex must be practiced with
care. There are three things that should always be used
whenever anal penetration is taking place; lubrication,
condoms and common sense. Liberal amounts of lubrication are
necessary because the rectal wall can be quite sticky and is
subject to tearing and lesions if not kept lubricated. (Our
favorite is Astroglide)
In addition, the anus and rectum are narrow, so lubrication
is needed to press inside smoothly. Condoms are another
necessity. Enemas, douches and other cleaners will not be
able to get all the germs and bacteria out of the rectum.
Not only is anal sex facilitate the transmission of STDs
better than any other form of sex, it can also cause urinary
tract infections and other bacterial diseases. Latex
protection is essential, and can offer additional slickness.
Finally, use your common sense. The rectal wall curves and
is thin so long, hard objects can tear your insides. Don't
wear any jewelry on your hands, and cut your fingernails if
you are going to put your finger in someone's anus. Most
importantly, respect your body. Don't push the limits and go
only as far as you feel comfortable.
Positions to try
The best positions for anal sex depend
largely on what stage you and your partner are at in your
experiences. Rear entry or the "doggie style"
position is the one position most people associate with anal
sex. However, rear entry allows a penis or anal toy to
penetrate most deeply, and may not be the best choice for
the beginner. A good starting position is the
"spoons" position, with each partner laying on his
or her side, one behind the other. This prevents the
penetrating partner from going too fast, and allows complete
control over penetration. It also brings you closer to your
partner, making it easier to judge his or her reactions to
what you're doing.
Another position for anal sex is a
variation of the missionary position. The receiving partner
lays on his or her back while the penetrating partner
approaches from on top. The penetrating partner lifts up the
calves or shins of the receiver, exposing the anus. This can
be an especially intimate position, with both partners
facing each other. The ‘top’ partner can masturbate the
other and is open to massage and cuddling as well.
Finally, rear entry offers another
possibility for anal penetration. This position allows the
penetration to be the deepest, and permits the receiver to
better open the anus for entry. Rear entry doesn't offer the
kind of intimacy or ease of communication that the other
positions do, but for more advanced lovers, can offer the
greatest amount of thrusting and penetration.
There are many more positions and
techniques to try. Many people discover new and exciting
positions through experimentation, and most people find the
one that best suits them. Good communication is the key to
such discovery, and a manual or video can help as well.
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Anal Delights These are products designed to be inserted into the
anus. Many sizes and styles are available. Beginners may wish to
start with a product called the
Anal Beginners Kit which offers four different sizes which allows you to
experiment and find the size you feel most comfortable with.
Condoms A flexible sheath, usually made of thin rubber or latex,
designed to cover the penis during sexual intercourse for contraceptive
purposes or as a means of preventing sexually transmitted diseases. When
using a lubricant with a condom it is imperative that a water-based lubricant
is used. Petroleum based lubricants, like Vaseline, deteriorate latex
products such as condoms.
Dongs- Jelly Most
dongs are shaped like a "real" penis. Typically they are used
for insertion in the vagina or the anus. Jelly Dongs are made of a jelly
material and usually come in a variety of colors. Also called a dildo.
Dongs- Realistic
Most dongs are shaped like a "real"
penis. Typically they are used for insertion in the vagina or
anus. Realistic Dongs closely resemble an actual penis. Many
Realistic Dongs are actually molded from stars in the adult
industry. Be sure to check the size of these products because many
are very large. Also called a dildo
Dongs- Strap OnA device worn
around the waist and pelvic region with a dong/dildo or butt plug
attached. Often the attachments are removable. This product can be
worn by both men and women. Most are designed for vaginal and/or anal
penetration.
Erection Rings The purpose of an
Erection Ring is to maintain a firm erection. Most Erection Rings
are worn around the base of the penis. If using an Erection Ring for the
first time, we recommend that you start with a quick-release ring that can be
adjusted and removed easily.
GamesSexy
Games are a perfect way to enhance your relationship. They bring new
levels of excitement to foreplay. Games encourage couples to be
comfortable with each other while being sexually playful.
Herbal Sex
These herbal blends offer a safe and natural alternative to other medical
sexual enhancers such as Viagra. They are designed to enhance sexual
function, stamina, and pleasure.
Kama Sutra Edible loving oils, creams, powders and other sexual
potions to entice your body and seduce your senses.
Lotions & Oils Various potions which add excitement to
foreplay and lovemaking.
Love Dolls Love Dolls are life-size replicas of fantasy
playmates. Many have realistic mouths, vaginas and anuses. There
are simple and inexpensive love dolls such as the
Asian Princess Doll or more realistic and expensive dolls like the
Latex Lady.
Lubricants Lubricants enhance the pleasure and comfort level of
sexual intercourse, sex toy use, and masturbation. When using a lubricant
with a condom it is imperative that a water-based lubricant is used.
Petroleum based lubricants, like Vaseline, deteriorate latex products such as
condoms.
Masturbators- Pocket Pals Masturbators are sex toys used by men to
enhance masturbation. Pocket Pal Masturbators are typically
shaped like vaginas, mouths, or anuses. Most are made of a
jelly material.
Masturbators- Realistic Masturbators are sex toys used by men to
enhance masturbation. Realistic Masturbators, are designed to
have the look and feel of a real vagina, mouth, or anus.
Masturbators- Senso Masturbators are sex toys used by men to
enhance masturbation. Senso Masturbators are made of a super-
stretchy, silicone material.
Penis Pumps A suction device used to temporarily create a firmer,
sometimes larger, penis. This is achieved by inserting the penis
into the pump's cylinder. The pump is then activated by a hand pump which
draws air out of the cylinder and increases the flow of blood to the penis.
Pleasure Balls Two or more balls specially weighted and designed
to be inserted into the vagina. The Pleasure Balls can be used to
help strengthen the vaginal muscles, leading to more intense orgasms.
This is achieved by tightening the vaginal muscles to keep the balls from
falling out. Many women also find it pleasurable to insert the balls
inside the vagina and move around, feeling the rhythm created by the balls
knocking against each other.
Pleasure
Beads A strand of beads connected together by a nylon cord.
Mainly used for anal stimulation but also enjoyed when inserted into the
vagina. The beads should be slowly inserted into the anus or vagina one
at a time. Remove them in the same fashion. Many people enjoy
withdrawing the beads upon point of climax to achieve more intense pleasure.
Vibrators- Clitoral Clitoral Vibrators are designed specifically
to stimulate the clitoris. Clitoral Vibrators usually come in one of two
styles: wearable or hand-held. Many of the wearable kinds can be worn during
intercourse or under clothing. The hand-held tend to be more powerful and give
you more control over placement of the vibrations.
Vibrators-
Clitterific Cant decide whether you want a vibrator for insertion
or clitoral stimulation? Well, these are the vibrators for you. Clitterific
Vibrators are multi-function vibrators. They have a shaft that rotates,
vibrates or thrusts inside the vagina while a clitoral nodule stimulates the
clitoris.
Vibrators- Eggs & Bullets Vibrating Eggs & Bullets are
small and discreet and can be placed just inside the vaginal opening. The
battery pack is connected to the Egg or Bullet with a thin cord.
Vibrators- GSpot The G-Spot is an area on the front wall of the
vagina located between the vaginal opening and the cervix. Some women
experience enhanced sexual arousal when the G-Spot is stimulated. G-Spot
vibrators have a little turn or bend at the top of the vibrator which allows
for easier self-stimulation of the G-Spot region.
Vibrators- HiTech Usually there is something unique or
different about a Hi-Tech Vibrator. For example, the
Remote Control Panty would be listed in this category. Vibrators that
are uniquely shaped or ultra-quiet would also be found in the Hi-Tech Vibrator
section.
Vibrators- Jelly Jelly Vibrators are made out of a jelly material.
This material tends to make the vibrator feel softer.
Vibrators- Traditional Traditional Vibrators are the most basic
style of vibrator designed for insertion in the vagina. Usually straight
up and down. Traditional Vibrators come in many sizes and colors. Many
have multi-speed vibrations.
Vibrators- Waterproof Waterproof vibrators can use them in the
shower, bath, hot tub, etc. Most tend to be very quiet so you can't hear
the vibrations over the noise created by the shower or running bath water.